God sends different people to journey with you in the different seasons of your life. Wisdom is discerning between those meant only to journey with you for a specific season, and those meant to be held close for a lifetime. Wisdom is intentionality in pursuing relationships and friendships. Wisdom is guarding and nurturing covenant relationships that are meant to last a lifetime. Wisdom is also having a spirit of release when a season of relationship is over – to allow both parties to move on to greater heights that were never meant to be journeyed on closely together. It does not mean you love each other any less, but it does mean releasing each other in the Lord in order to allow further growth and expansion. It does not mean cutting off all contact but it does mean not being selfish and not holding each other back. It means trusting that the Lord will bring new friends to walk with both parties in that new season.
People have walked in and out of my life over the past few years – some were meant only to journey with me for a particular season, while others I know are covenant relationships meant to last a lifetime. I have learnt intentionality when pursuing relationships and friendships. I have learnt the necessity of protecting and pouring into covenant relationships. I have also learnt how to live with an open hand in order to release somebody to the Lord when it is time for the next season in their life and in mine. Discernment, and then the following appropriate intentionality is extremely important. There is no such thing as coincidence – God sends people into our lives for specific seasons and reasons. We must know who belongs to when, and for how long, and then intentionally pursue and act on that. Relationships are important, and never, ever random. Who we surround ourselves with will make or break our destinies.
Also, I have realized that covenant relationships call for a greater level of intimacy and vulnerability. Although not the rule for every case (because there are seasonal friendships that are no less beautiful and intense), I have found this to be generally true. Wisdom is found in setting boundaries when necessary, and then letting down our guard without fear when God calls for it. Build fences, but never walls. Let those fences have doors, and be brave to open those doors and allow the right people access into the deepest parts of your heart. We were never meant to do this thing called life alone. We must not fear vulnerability when it comes to the right people, or we will rob ourselves of the one thing our hearts were made for – love.
Be wise and discern, and then be brave.