Love, Musings, Poetry

Wishful Thinking

Coffee, hope, poetry. I don’t know if I’d read it somewhere, but these three words keep ringing wistfully in my head lately. Perhaps it is because they are representative of the things that tug at my heart the most in this life. Oh would we all be so lucky to have our days filled with drawn out coffee conversations, quiet hope and beautiful poetry that makes sense of it all. What else could one ask for. Perhaps it is the simplest things that mean the most after all. 

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Musings, Pain, Words

What do I say to you girls — you beautiful girls? You girls who are having the Bad Year — the Bad Year where you cannot remember why you were happy aged 12, and cannot imagine being happy at 21? … That panic and anxiety will lie to you — they are gonzo, malign commentators on the events of your life. Their counsel is wrong. You are as high, wired and badly advised by adrenaline as you would be by cocaine. Panic and anxiety are mad, drugged fools. Do not listen to their grinding-toothed, sweaty bullshit … And the most important thing? To know that you were not born like this. You were not born scared and self-loathing and overwhelmed. Things have been done — which means things can be undone. It is hard work. But you are not scared of hard work, compared with everything else you have dealt with.

Caitlin Moran 

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Pain, Prayer, Trials, Wilderness

Hanging on by a tiny thread

There are times when life corners you in so, and all you can do is fall on your face before God for help, hoping against hope that He will come through for you. That your tears are not in vain and that there is a God who sees and hears. That, whatever it looks like, your redemption will come. 

Please don’t make me wait for too long, I’m so afraid I might let go. 

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Love

Dignity 

It took me several heartbreaks to finally understand that fighting for love and fighting to be loved were two profoundly different things. Fighting for love is always good, but there is absolutely nothing heroic about the latter. It is not romantic to convince somebody to love you. 

I beseech you women, if you ever find yourself pleading for a man to choose you, if you ever find yourself trying to change who you are in order to fit what he wanted, to be prettier, quieter… lesser – turn around and leave. Leave and never look back. 

“What are you, fire refusing to be named? I will tell you what you are not.

You are not an afterthought. You are not a magic lamp whose only purpose is to fulfill the desires of another. You are not an oracle or a muse that can be used, exhausted, tapped dry & left convulsing on a mountaintop. You are not a lonely night or a place to hide secrets when no one else is watching. You are not a bodiless voice that whispers comfort to the demons of desperate men, not a vessel from which they can thieve their vitality..

& my God, you are certainly not a second choice.” // Amanda Torroni 

Please know when to stay, and when to walk away. Sometimes the line is so thin, and sometimes it takes more than a little while, but you must know it. 

– lessons learnt a very hard way.

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