Destiny, mercy, Musings, The Voyage

Sweet Relief

“You liberate me from my own noise and my own chaos // From the chains of a lesser love You set me free.”

He sets us free. From the things we can’t save ourselves from… and even from the things we didn’t know we needed saving from. 

I have been waking up with a lightness of spirit. I’ve been walking through these days with hope flowering in my heart. My heart is no longer divided – I know what I want and I know who it is that I desire. The fight that once waged war within my inner being is gone. Oh what a sweet tender relief it is to know this quietness. It’s been a long time coming, but I can finally see again!

With glimmering eyes I lift my head up to heaven and breathe in hope. With a growing steadiness, I walk onwards. 

Truly, there are far far better things ahead than any we leave behind. 

Musings, The Voyage

Stand Your Ground

Enough is enough. Sometimes you have to draw the lines and decide what you will and will not allow in your life. Stand your ground, beloved. Stand your ground and fight. Shake off all that hinders. Throw away everything that entangles. Cut off what brings death so you can step into true life. 

Enough is enough. 

Stay free. 

Keep walking. 

“One thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.” Philippians‬ ‭3:13-14‬ ‭

Strengthen your feeble knees and keep on keeping on. A wise man once said that the choices you make today will ripple through the generations that come after you. He’s right you know. Discard the toxic. Choose the pure and good. It will be worth it all. 



Obedience out of love and obedience to earn love are two very different things. The first operates in delight and ease, and the latter causes us to strive in exhaustion. There is rest in the first, and an unease in the second.

What if you knew there was absolutely nothing you could do to change the fact that He already looks upon you in love and delight? What if obedience wasn’t to earn the affections of His heart, but instead, an expression of love and trust towards Him?

There is complete security in the embrace of the Father. His love for us is whole and perfect, not because we are perfect but because He is. When you understand that, obedience without condition is no longer a struggle.. it turns into the delight of a trusting child who wants nothing more than the smile of her Papa.

Destiny, The Church, Trials

Merdeka Merdeka Merdeka

Was at Dataran Merdeka for the first time tonight. It looked so.. regal. Sigh.

I’m so glad I was born in this land. I love Malaysia, and though it’s nothing but chaos all around me, while I breathe, I still hope for my nation. I know her worth in God’s heart. Malaysia is scorned by the nations, and even by her own people, but there is a purpose dreamed of in His heart for this nation that no eye has seen and no ear has heard.

See, darkness covers the earth and thick darkness is over the peoples, but the Lord rises upon you and his glory appears over you. – Isaiah‬ ‭60:2‬ ‭

This was spoken over Israel in approx 400 BC but today the same words resound over this nation. In the midst of some of the darkest years Malaysia has ever seen, His glory will erupt in the local Church like never before. The years that are coming will be turbulent, but in the midst of it all, His presence will be known more and more and His Church will stand as a sure lighthouse for this nation. Just you wait and see.

Happy Merdeka Day Malaysia. You are precious and not forgotten.

Intimacy, Longing, Love, Musings

Of Freedom, Love and Pursuit

A person who feels safe is bound to show you their best. The heart that knows it is loved by present company will blossom beautifully. Because it feels safe, there will not arise any urgency to strive or prove anything. Instead there comes a great freedom to just be. I know this to be true for me – I am the bravest and the most free when I feel loved and safe. But I am so prone to hiding when my heart is wary and unsure. Isn’t it strange how the human heart works? Yet, far be it from us for the condition of our hearts to depend on the risings and fallings of men. It is a shaky road to walk on because even the best and most loving of men can cause hurt sometimes. Nobody is completely constant or safe all the time, even towards those they love. That is the err of human behavior – it comes inevitably as part and parcel of fallen nature. Should we then push everybody away? How then will we cultivate intimacy – the one thing we need most from one another?

Maybe there is an answer. I think, when one abides and is constantly enveloped by the warmth of Father’s arms, there results a great sigh of relief from within – a beautiful freedom to just be because one knows they are already completely accepted; yes, even in the company of those who are not yet safe for the heart. The one who walks in the presence of Divine Love walks in freedom, because their heart is covered by God – irregardless of present company. It is an amazing thing to be free – free to pursue intimacy, free to pursue love – even with imperfect man. (Of course, there is wisdom in knowing which relationships are meant to be pursued with nearness, and which are better off attended to at a distance; but that can be pondered upon another day.) When my heart is being pursued and protected, it is easier for me to pursue the hearts of those who are meant for me to love. I am not as scared of rejection and hurt if I already feel safe. Only when I am loved can I love well.

I want to love well. I want to be pursued, and I want to pursue, because if all of life comes down to love, I want to love well.

Love, Musings

Real Love

So many don’t know their worth. They accept “love” that isn’t love at all. Emotional blackmail. Emotional abuse. Physical abuse. Cheating. Lying. Being treated like an option. Being chucked aside. Being trampled on. Being used for sex and lustful gratification. They accept it all because they don’t know that they deserve better.

But the one who realizes their worth will not stand for any of that. The one who realizes that they deserve better will not accept a lesser “love”, but will dare to receive real love. Real love that honors, respects, protects, treasures, pursues, frees and heals.

We accept the love we think we deserve. Do you know your worth? Stop settling. You are worthy of real love.

Fear of God, Intimacy, Longing, Musings

I Dare to Call Him Father

Sometimes, I struggle to understand a God who is both Intimate Love and Holy Fear at the same time. My mind is so limited, my capacity for understanding is so small. There are times when I am so overwhelmed by holy reverence that I feel I am unable to come close to Him. He is truly the glorious One on the Throne, and it makes me tremble because I am but dust. Sometimes when I am overwhelmed by the fear of God, I lose sight of His love. I struggle to put two and two together. But He has shown me (and continues to show me) that though His wrath is real, it is not for me! His righteous fury and hatred of sin is frightening, but it is not for me! It is only when I lose sight of the work of Jesus on that cross that I lose sight of my right to come as close as I want to Him.

I was once far but now He has brought me near. Now I can boldly enter into the presence of the Holy One, and find a dear Father’s heart. What was in the Garden is now mine. 

How silly it is of me to stand far off when He has made a way for me to be near. How silly it is of me to try and enter a room I am already in. How silly it is for me to strive for something He has already given me. The nearness of God is for me. The tenderness of God is for me. My Father’s heart is for me. 

For freedom Christ has set us free; stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to a yoke of slavery. (‭Galatians‬ ‭5‬:‭1‬ ESV)

I am not a slave. I am a child. His wrath is real but it is no longer for me. I refuse to submit to the heartbreaking yoke of slavery and religion. Boldly, I come.